This isn’t really a fun post and I’m not really sure if I should even bother writing about this, but it’s just something in my personal life that has been on my mind and I have to get it off my chest for a bit. Sorry if this is kind of long and doesn’t really […]
I understand what Mari is saying. I spent all of my younger and some of my adult life wearing various faces that really had no relationship to who I was or what I wanted to be. Pretending to act social, trying to play the game. “If only you’d do blah blah blah, you’d have friends.”
It was always what someone else wanted me to be. I usually failed at those. Never got the brownie points just for trying that everyone told me I’d get, while I also missed out on being me.
Then there was the defensive face you put on, usually a flat, neutral face, because the real you simply wasn’t acceptable in polite company and you had best not reveal anything. When and where I grew up disapproval and ostracism were not the worst thing that might happen. One needs to do whatever one can to find a better place and go there, not stay in a hostile environment.
It is good that age and perspective can turn a painful experience into a neutral memory.
Those dogs are wonderful!